salt n pepa

You know what? I’m kind of tired of people acting all funny-like whenever the topic of sex comes up. It is quite ridiculous that grown folk act like pre-pubescent teens whenever the subject is broached. I mean, it’s either that or looking at you like the spawn of the devil. Come on people, let’s get real – sex is out there! We all know it and cannot keep dancing around its prevalent existence now, can we? Sex should stop being treated like taboo because frankly, it is the reason we are all here! Be it through intercourse or insemination; marriage, fling or (sad but true) rape, sex brought us all here. So, with that in mind…


Let’s Talk About Sex

Let me try and clarify something first, well, the way I see it anyway. Sex should not be confused with pornography. When people are just being unnecessarily rude or explicit with sex talk, then I understand anyone being irritated but when the topic in its generality is just broached, the “eww” responses and cringed faces that surface are simply ridiculous. People who respond in such a manner just single themselves out as suspect. Sex is an everyday part of our lives whether we choose to accept it or not. As rapper Candy Man stated a few years ago in his hit song, “Knockin’ Boots”:

Knockin’/while I’ma hip hoppin’/many people say my lyrics are shocking/all because of the simple subject/everyone should love it/’cause everybody does it/whether they admit it or if they deny it/boy you better keep quiet…

However, there are instances that one has to look at it from a different POV though. When someone is ALWAYS talking about sex, it is likely that the person:

a) Is a Sexologist that loves his/her job a lot
b) Is a sex maniac
c) Is a pervert or
d) Is not getting any sex at all

With this in mind, I hope this blog will not be seen as a sexed up piece, I am just addressing those who still get all stiff at just the mention of sex like it is an evil, deplorable practice. Especially when you know for a fact that such people have active sex lives and not with just one partner. Some people refer to them as “holier than thou” but I just see them as misguided. It is okay to talk/ask about sex amongst fellow adults.

From a Nigerian stand point however, I kind of understand this reserved nature when it comes to sex. Hardly any parents discussed sex with their children. I know my parents didn’t. My only recollection is my mother finding condoms in my brother’s bag (she had no business being in there in the first place) and reporting it to my father. All dad said to him was “you better be careful” to the chagrin of mama.
In fact, sex is treated like taboo out here so I can see where people are coming from. However, growing up, meeting different people and gaining exposure/enlightenment, you would expect folk to be more open. Unfortunately, this is not the case. When sex is talked about, it usually is the topic of jokes, verbal abuse (usually to/about a cheating or inadequate lover) or embellishment (e.g. I did her and ALL her friends – yeah right!).

Some might be reading this now and go as far as calling me vulgar. Good! It is you I am speaking to in this blog. Why am I vulgar? For talking about a force of nature? Open up your mind and see the bigger picture. AIDS is primarily a sexually transmitted disease that is regarded as the world’s most dangerous disease but there is one more deadly that everyone is born with – ignorance. As the years go on, ignorance is slowly reduced as we acquire knowledge on different subjects. Since no one person can know everything, we will always ALL be ignorant to certain things. However, sex is not one of them. We all know about sex (eventually) as a general phenomenon but do we really know sex? As far as some are concerned sex is just intercourse. Period. It is a lot deeper than that really. Sex is mental, verbal and even abstract, not just physical. Sex is life as well, not a way of life (although it is but you feel me, no?) because it is the (let’s call it) ritual that brings life. Even amongst insects, that’s the way it goes. All creatures have sex in common, sexual or asexual.

I’m going to stop here because I’ve lost the plot. I don’t even know what I’m writing again. I started this on a high on Friday (8/4) but stopped short and just picked up Sunday (8/6) so am kind of off. I do hope I have made sense though? I always think I do but just have problems expressing myself properly for people to see where I’m coming from. I guess what I may be really trying to say is we need to re-assess our position and re-educate ourselves on the topic of sex. Don’t be afraid/shy to talk to/ask friends/family/doctors/councellors about sex. There is nothing wrong with wanting to know. Heck, I wanna know!

Like SNP, “let’s talk about all the good things and the bad things that may be…”

I’m out like England in a penalty shootout!

PS – And once again, to anyone who has issues with this blog, like Slim Shady once rapped:

“I’m only giving you things you joke about with your friends inside your living room…”

And that line right there may be the mantra of one Blog Marley because all his blogs (all 11 of them – SMILE) contain such cannon fodder that other’s would rather dance around. With that said:

“I’m Blog Marley, yes I’m the real Marley/all you other Blog Marley’s is just imitating/so won’t the real Blog Marley please post more/please post more/please post more…”

You asked for it and baby you got it! Peace Blog Heads!